How do I build curiosity around sex instead of fear

Building Curiosity Around Sex

How do I build curiosity around sex instead of fear? That is a very good question. You want to invest in great stories. We are creators of narratives and stories.

We build stories in our minds. We read stories. We hear other people’s stories.

Those stories inspire different things in us. For example, if you are someone who is already nervous about penetration and you are hearing about men who are so huge they injure their partners or make them cry, you are going to be afraid. If what you keep hearing is negative, it will naturally inspire fear.

Both fear and curiosity are inspired by stories, so what you want to start paying attention to is how pleasurable sex can be. What are the benefits of it? What is the good side of it? Some people say sex can help you lose weight, depending on how often you have it, because it can be quite rigorous exercise. Others talk about how well they sleep afterwards.

Some people talk about the pleasure and excitement of it. You want to focus on the positive side, but if you are someone who is not sexually active, that kind of information can also put you in a position that is detrimental. If you are not ready and you begin to desire sex, you may end up settling rather than preparing for it. So that is something you want to be careful about—the balance between curiosity and exposure.

You also do not want to expose yourself unless you are saying that you are now willing to explore.